The official blog of Mindful Solutions Clinic.
Sandy Kiaizadeh, M.A., RP, is a Toronto-area registered psychotherapist, clinical hypnotherapist, life coach, mindfulness teacher, and energy healer.
For more information about Sandy and her programs, please visit www.MindfulSolutionsClinic.com.
I am not usually in the habit of recycling my old blog entries, but in light of the recent passing of one of our generation's trailblazing inventors, I'd like to draw your attention to a classic 'Bliss post on Steve Jobs' 12 Rules For Success, along with the original commencement video from which the 12 lessons are drawn.
In order to receive blessings in your life you must believe two things. First, you must believe that whatever you want is possible. And second, you must believe that you deserve it.
It’s one thing to believe that it is possible to have a healthy and prosperous life, and completely another to believe that you deserve it. You were meant to be prosperous – in health, love, joy and finance.
Do you believe that? Or are sabotaging thoughts permitting you from receiving your blessings? If you want to receive these blessings, then you must eliminate the sabotaging thoughts and replace them with a simple mantra that says “I deserve to receive blessings in my life.”
Nature is one of the greatest sources of happiness. In fact, humans have lived in the lap of nature for millions of years and their stay in modern cities is comparably very very short. Even today, many people still live in close proximity to nature.
Nature is all free! It is there for everybody to stand and stare and derive happiness and solace from. It does not distinguish between rich or poor, strong or weak, man or woman. The golden sun is free, as is the silvery moon. Cool breeze, warm seashore, imposing mountains, smooth flowing rivers, dark and inviting forests... Free, free, all are free! It is free, not because it is cheap, but it is rather priceless. How much would it cost to make only an artificial island with rivers, forests, mountains, and surrounding ocean? A million dollars? A billion? And if one can afford it, will he donate it to humanity, free for everyone to enjoy? Or will he charge an entrance fee?
When we see the moon, we see it in its entirety, no matter how many millions of people are seeing it at the same time. Similarly, the sky, the sun, the ocean, rain and sunshine - all are there for us to possess fully. Each can stare at the sky and claim all of it for his or her own happiness.
Nature understands our moods. If we are sad, it is also sad with us. But it does not make us sadder. It does not lead us to further despair. It applies gentle balm to our wounds. It sits besides us like a mother, spouse, sibling, or a friend and embraces us, talks to us, listens to us patiently, empathizes with us. Slowly it lifts our spirits, makes us see our woes, worries, and wounds in the right perspective of infinite time and space. Next thing you know, we are smiling, laughing, and are happy again!
Do you appreciate the infinite beauty that is lying around in the form of nature?
Changing our day-to-day behaviors may be easier than previously imagined. By meditating on and repeating motivational and inspirational quotes, we are better prepared to change our thought patterns, behaviors and in turn, change our lives.
Here's how it's done:
If we believe something to be easy, we find little, if any struggle in accomplishing it. However, if we imagine something to be difficult to accomplish, then our struggle becomes more apparent. In fact, if we imagine that it is difficult to change a specific behavior, then we will always find experiences that will justify that belief.
Take this for example. We wake up one morning and decide that:
"This is the day I start losing weight. When things get difficult, I will not reach for junk food, but instead I will focus on something else to keep my mind occupied. It'll be tough at first, but I'm going to give it a try."
If you continue with this thought pattern and belief, don't be surprised to find yourself struggling more often than not. Why?
If we look at this example closely we find a couple of thought patterns and beliefs already in place. We have determined to do something good for ourselves, but we do ourselves a disservice by choosing certain negative thought patterns, beliefs and words that go along with it.
We have said,
"When things get difficult...."
(This is already assuming that there will be difficult moments! Strike one!)
"It'll be tough at first..."
(This is already assuming it will be difficult at first! Strike two!)
"...but I'm going to give it a try."
(Remember the movie "The Karate Kid"..."There is no "try", there is only "do". Strike three!)
Now there are hundreds of products out there that will assist people in losing weight. Some, if not all of them, may work for various people at various stages of their goal. But for many people who have convinced themselves that losing weight is difficult, some products may fall short when our thought patterns are stronger than our desire to change.
Here is something that a client I worked with did to change a behavior she no longer desired. She recently lost 20lbs in about 12 weeks. She hadn’t liked the way she looked, felt or even thought for that matter. She needed to change and take some action towards it.
First, she realized that she had to change her way of thinking about losing weight. Her old thought patterns were no longer working for her. Her thoughts were like little tiny pictures that she projected in her mind of how heavy she was. She no longer wanted these pictures or thought patterns a part of her life. She had to choose a thought pattern and belief that would be easier to think about.
She chose this thought,
"Losing weight is easier than I thought."
Perhaps not the most ideal for everyone but it worked for her.
Secondly, she chose a word she wanted to focus on for that day, week or month to help her in accomplishing her goal (Start with just a day, or just an hour for that matter. Keep it simple.) The word she chose needed to be in relation to the change she wants to make. For example, she chose the word "FOCUS", as she felt that that's what she needed to think about most of time; focusing more on losing weight than gaining it. Choose any word as long as it relates to your situation. (Attitude, Energy, Action, Believe...)
Following that, she scoured the Internet for motivational and inspirational quotes that resonated within her that related to that specific word she chose - quotes that she could remember, especially ones that really spoke to what she wanted to accomplish.
But here's the most important part.
She needed quotes that were powerful enough to change her thought patterns the moment she read them. Quotes that REALLY spoke to her when her my eyes fell upon them. Quotes that forced her to pause and think for a moment. Quotes that had that extra "edge" where her mind said, "Yes. This is one."
These are all signs of a quote that held power for her. She "focused" in on the following quotes.
"All that we are is the result of what we have thought." ~ Buddha
"The only way to discover the limits of the possible, is to go beyond them into them impossible." ~ Arthur C. Clarke
"It's not what you achieve in the end that matters, it's who you become in the process." ~ Author Unknown
In fact, she found dozens of quotes that she resorted to from time to time, but these three she always came back to. They spoke of who she was, what she wanted to accomplish and who she wanted to become as she worked towards her goal.
She wrote them down. She carried these quotes with her constantly. She read them and meditated on them whenever she had the opportunity to. At work, home or at the gym (yup, she finally got myself to exercise, primarily by focusing on Arthur C. Clarke's quote!), she focused on these three powerful quotes to help her FOCUS on what she wanted.
Because she changed her thought patterns, over time, she can honestly say she is 20 lbs lighter and a whole lot happier. Yes, she will be the first to admit that accomplishing the goal involved more than just thinking but it all began with her thoughts. The thoughts then permeated into her actions. (Now she needs to FOCUS on maintaining that weight, so for her, a whole new thought pattern begins.)
Here are the three steps again:
1. Decide to change your way of thinking about a behavior, making it easier for you to think about it. Phrase it in a simple way.
2. Choose a word to focus on to change that behavior for a period of time.
3. Find a minimum of three motivational or inspirational quotes related to that specific word that are powerful enough to change your current thought patterns the moment you read them. Meditate on them and repeat them, silently or out loud, every chance you get.
Be patient. Stick with it. Give it some time.
Why do you think companies offer a 30-day money back guarantee? They know that if you do something for 30 days it becomes a habit and you no longer need to return it! (Learned something, huh?) Give it time.
The first step to what you want to accomplish is changing your mind and the thought patterns and beliefs associated with your behavior. Thoughts are the precursor to action, meaning that thoughts occur before any action takes place. That's what needs to be changed first - your thoughts.
It worked for my client and I hope this inspires and motivates you to achieve your goal.
, we are better prepared to change our thought patterns, behaviors and in turn, change our lives. 