Success: Moving Past Fear

There are times when simply thinking positively won’t move you past your fear and anxiety.  There are times when simply plodding it out is the thing you must do.

If you’re afraid to do it, just DO IT AFRAID.

No one will blame you for being fearful—what you will be blamed for is letting that fear immobilize you.  So no matter what it takes, keep moving. 

Fear is much like a quagmire—it slurps at our feet and if we stand still long enough, it begins to suck us down.  It’s hard to get out of, but it is possible.

If you’re stuck in fear as you shoot for success, there are several ways out:

1. Consider the source.  Where did the fear come from?  Have you been dwelling on the difficulties instead of the opportunities?  Have you been listening to those who are cynics and pessimists, instead of coaching yourself with positive words and people?  If so, MOVE ON.  GET AWAY from people and situations that drag you down.
2. Take your checklist and note what you HAVE accomplished.  Look at your list of goals and the baby steps you’re taking to get there, and on a separate sheet of paper (or a separate document in your computer), begin to list everything you have accomplished.  This will begin to empower you to move on and leave the fear behind.
3. Take stock of your talents and skills.  Fear often tells us that we “don’t have what it takes…”  Show fear as the liar it is:  list your skills, all your positive attributes.  Then look at the problem again, after you have a new appreciation for your God-given talents and abilities.
4. Don’t underestimate the power of prayer.  Regardless of your spiritual beliefs, there is an amazing power that comes from releasing your fear to a universe who loves you and is looking out for you.  Don’t bottle the fear up—let it go.  You don’t need it anyhow!
5. Finally, remember this acronym when facing fear:

• F= False
• E= Evidence
• A=Appearing
• R=Real

Because that’s really what fear is—it is an unrealistic look (false look) at something and attempting to make you believe it (appearing to be real). 

Once you know these things, you’ll be able to move past your fear and on to the next step you need to be successful!

In Bliss,
Coach Sandy


© 2010, Find Your Bliss Coaching. http://findyourblisscoaching.icopyright.com

What Would You Do If You Only Had a Short Time to Live?

Today's blog is a guest post from Zen Habits blogger Leo Babauta.

It’s hard, from within the storm of every day life, to see things with real perspective, to know what’s important and what’s simply pressing on our consciousness right now, demanding attention. We have people emailing us for information and requesting action, we have phone calls and visitors and a long to-do list and a million chores and errands to run and all of the slings and arrows of our daily reality … and yet, what is important?

Ask yourself this: if you suddenly found out you only had 6 months to live (for whatever reason), would the thing in front of you matter to you?

Would those 20 emails waiting for a response matter? Would the paperwork waiting to be processed matter? Would the work you’re doing matter? Would the meetings you’re supposed to have matter? Would a big car and nice house and high-paying job and cool computer and mobile device and nice shoes and clothes matter? I’m not saying they wouldn’t matter … but it’s important to ask yourself if they would.

What would matter to you?

For many of us, it’s the loved ones in our lives. If we don’t have loved ones … maybe it’s time we started figuring out why, and addressing that. Maybe we haven’t made time for others, for getting out and meeting others and helping others and being compassionate and passionate about others. Maybe we have shut ourselves in somehow. Or maybe we do have loved ones in our lives, but we don’t seem to have the time we want to spend with them. When was the last time you told your loved ones you loved them? Spent good quality time with them, being in the moment?

For many of us, doing work that matters … would matter. That might mean helping others, or making a vital contribution to society, or creating something brilliant and inspiring, or expressing ourselves somehow. It’s not the money that matters, but the impact of the work. Are you doing work that matters?
For many of us, experiencing life would matter — really being in the moment, finding passion in our lives, seeing the world and traveling, or just seeing the world that’s around us right now, being with great people, doing amazing things, eating amazing food, playing.

These are just a few ideas … but what would matter to you?

I highly recommend that you spend at least a little time now, and regularly, thinking about this question … figuring out what really matters … and living a life that shows this. How do you live a life that puts a great emphasis on what matters? Start by figuring out what matters, and what doesn’t. Then eliminate as much as you can of the stuff that doesn’t matter, or at least minimize it to the extent possible. Make room for what does matter. Make the time for what does matter … today. Put it on your schedule, and don’t miss that appointment. Make those tough decisions — because choosing to live a life that is filled with the important stuff means making choices, and they’re not always easy choices. But it matters. Spend time with your significant other, show them how important they are. Take the time to cuddle with your child, to read with her, to play with her, to have good conversations with her, to take walks with her. Take time to be in nature, to appreciate the beauty of the world around us. Take time to savor the little pleasures in life.

Because while you might not have only 6 months to live, I’m here to break the news to you: you really do only have a short time to live. Whether that’s 6 months, 6 years or 60 … it’s but the blink of an eye. The life you have left is a gift. Cherish it. Enjoy it now, to the fullest. Do what matters, now.



In Bliss,
Coach Sandy

© 2010, Find Your Bliss Coaching. http://findyourblisscoaching.icopyright.com

Pay It Forward!

Tonight marks the eve of Yom Kippur, the Jewish Day of Atonement. The most solemn of the Jewish holidays, its central themes are atonement and repentance. Observant followers will try to amend their behavior and seek forgiveness for wrongs done against God and against other human beings. The evening and day of Yom Kippur are set aside for public and private petitions and confessions of guilt. At the end of Yom Kippur, one considers one's self absolved by God.

I prefer to take this one step further... Getting out of our busy mode and into our heart, I'm certain that many of us could find at least one moment during our day where we could pause, reflect on a situation, and see something that we can do to make a difference in someone else's life.

The pace of life and work has increased a lot and we don't give as much thought as we could to the circumstances of other people's lives. Sometimes, we're so caught up in our own struggles that we don't think we can even afford to "give" our time, suggestions, talents, to others. And yet, if we do, we are rewarded.

We are oftentimes throughout our lives able to experience richness, synchronicity and reward through small acts of generosity. This isn't even about money, although sometimes the rewards will impact our financial status as well. And yet, we fail too often when we are so self-absorbed or consumed by our own situation, thinking we'd give up too much by helping.

So, this is just a gentle reminder for all of us to pay attention to at least one "little thing" that will make a difference for someone else.

In Bliss,
Coach Sandy

Sandy Kiaizadeh
Find Your Bliss Coaching